I recently asked you how you all view me. Now I’m wondering how you view this blog. You see, some really bright and articulate spanking models including Adele Haze, Niki Flynn, and Pandora have been discussing the issue of feminism and spanking models/ spanking porn. I think they raise a really valid question, and I’d love to pick it up here. But, I think the moment may have passed here. Plus, they’ve already made all the really relevant points. Essentially, the original argument put forth by Pandora was that perceptions of spanking porn and models are only going to change if models are writing and speaking out about it.
Adele Haze picked up the thread and said this:
“There are two types of model blogs. There are the “See the Girl, Not Just the Bottom” bloggers: those of us who use our writing to impose our opinions on the unwilling world, and then there are “shopfront” blogs, used purely for the model’s marketing purposes and communication with clients. (And then there’re blogs that are a bit of both, but even a tiny feminist platform is a platform nonetheless.)”
So, I’m wondering. Do people consider my blog to be a “shopfront” blog? Is there an assumption that the thoughts I put here are purely for the purpose of self promotion and not because I have thoughts I want to share? Obviously, my blog is attached to a pay site. I do try to promote myself and my site. Do you think that’s all it is?
I personally have never thought of my blog that way. I have always thought it was me giving everyone a little view of my life and my head, although the fact that it might also help my site is not completely out of my mind. So, what do you think? Is this a shopfront? Am I supporting the cause of feminism, hurting it, or being totally neutral?
I’ll be fascinated to hear.
I’ve been giving a lot of thought to “vanilla violations” lately. In two contexts. First, as a spanking model I have to live two lives. Not everyone in my life is privy to the details of what I do and I’d certainly prefer to keep it that way. If I show up at a kink event I certainly have no problem with people acknowledging that they recognize me (if they do, I’m not sure I’m actually that famous!). However, if I am walking down the street with my family, I would be very upset if someone approached me and wanted to talk about spanking. I would consider it highly inappropriate. Luckily for me this has never happened! I sincerely hope it never does…
On the other hand, a lot of my kink is hottest when played out publicly. I’ve recounted on this blog an incident where Niki Flynn had to stand in the corner in a restaurant. I’ve also been spanked in public places, though admittedly privately. I love the danger. I also love being lectured within earshot of unwitting people. I love being photographed with my pants down in public and recognizable places. All of this is contrary to my feeling that kinky scenes should not be imposed upon non consenting parties.
So what’s the answer? Well, so far it seems to be to do things in public places that are relatively empty. This way I get the feeling of danger without the reality of offending people. Sometimes there will still be a misjudgment and people will come upon you unexpectedly. So far no one has ever acted offended. Sometimes it’s also ok, if you can read people correctly. For instance, the waiter in the restaurant was as enthusiastic as we were. It’s a tricky issue, though. I’d love to hear some more thoughts.
So, I have a question. Actually it’s a few questions. How do you guys see spanking models? More specifically, how do you see me?
There is always a debate about whether or not spanking videos are a type of pornography. I’d love to hear people’s views on that question. I’m also curious to hear from the “spanking videos are porn” camp about spanking models. Do you think of them in the same category as porn stars? Most of us aren’t having actual sex on camera, but we are certainly doing something that is highly arousing and sexual for many people. So, that’s a question.
Then there is the issue of what turns your crank. There is a wide variety of variation in spanking videos. Young girls, more mature women, sexual, non sexual etc. Where on this scale do you folks see me? I’m going to take a wild guess here and suggest that most people who join my site aren’t looking for highly sexual scenes with mature women, but I could be wrong….
There also seems to be an impression out there that spanking models are not actually kinky. I imagine if you’re reading this blog you probably know I am in fact kinky in my own right, but I’d love to hear about that too. So, yeah. Tell me what you know, what you think, and what you think you know!
So, I’m in for a new experience tonight. You see, several of the local bottoms and submissives decided that we should do what we do best- take care of each others needs. This took a bit of discussion to work everything out but the plan is a play party tonight limited only to submissives. There are many exciting kinky activities planned for tonight, but of course my focus is on spanking.
Tonight for the first time, I’m going to try spanking a guy. I have warned him that I don’t know what I am doing. This doesn’t seem to be much of a deterrent for him, though. I told him all the horrible things I am going to bring tonight including my ebony hairbrush, heavy tawse, and the red meanie. I know first hand how all of these feel so I think I can really enjoy inflicting them on others.
To be fair I think I am primarily going to be in charge of the warm up. But, with implements like these at my disposal I don’t think it takes much force to make a big impression. I am very interested to see how this is going to go. Wish me luck!
“Go downstairs and wait for me.”
That’s what I heard when I went to tell my boyfriend goodnight the other night. Well, it wasn’t when I was planning to have a scene, but beggars can’t be choosers right? Besides, my need to be spanked always wins out over my need for sleep. So, I dutifully went downstairs and waited.
There is one little problem, though. I’m not good at waiting. Waiting makes the butterflies start moving in my tummy and there is no stopping them until the waiting is over. Extreme examples of this have been being made to wait days or even weeks for a punishment I knew was coming. Compared to that this should have been easy, but it wasn’t. Maybe because I didn’t already know I was likely to be spanked that day, since I hadn’t done anything wrong.
Sitting alone in a room thinking about the fact that in a few moments, or maybe minutes, I am going to be punished has a profound effect on me. I can’t help but wonder things like, “What is he going to use on me?” “Will it be really bad this time?” “Did I actually do something wrong or is this going to be fun?” “What if I scream too loud and wake the neighbors?” It’s inevitable that all my thinking will get me far more worked up and stressed out than if he’d just grabbed me and started spanking me. In fact sometimes I can get *so* lost in my own thoughts that the spanking itself can be anti climactic.
That was nearly the case the other night. When my boyfriend finally arrived to find me a nervous wreck he said, “I considered having you wait here for a while and then coming and telling you to go to bed.” Apparently he rejected that idea though because he proceeded to give me a strapping that may well have woken the neighbors. In this instance my butterflies were definitely justified. All I have to say is ouch.
My boyfriend just got a new gift. It’s a belt. Actually it’s a very special belt- hand made by the London Tanners. If you look at the London Tanners site you can see that he has many fine implements for sale. I pretty much hate them all. Really. This is because I am a big wimp.
As you are looking through the site, though, you may notice that there are no belts anywhere in his list of products. He does have some straps that are similar to belts, but none of them will hold up your pants. By and large this is not an issue because of course the products at The London Tanners are made for the purpose of spanking bottoms rather than holding up pants. However, my boyfriend lost his favorite belt a while back and has been unable to replace it.
This is a problem for him for two reasons. First, he wears a belt nearly every day. It is an essential part of his wardrobe. He is really picky about his accessories and got his first belt at a special event from a local leather worker. Nothing from the local department store lives up to that legacy. The other reason is that the missing belt was also his main disciplinary tool. Using his belt for most punishments has several positive effects of my psyche. This is no small part due to the fact that it is in front of my face most days.
So, I turned to my friend the London Tanner. I asked him how he would feel about making a belt. He said he would think about it, although I don’t think he was feeling overly enthusiastic. It took a couple of months, but I did finally get an answer. He agreed to make me the belt but the price he set was high! In addition to the financial cost of the belt, I have to offer up my own bottom for a hard caning from the London Tanner himself! I sure hope my boyfriend appreciates the sacrifice…
At any rate, the belt arrived and it is lovely! My boyfriend agrees, and in fact wore it to work today! I will try to post a picture of it in the next couple of days. I wouldn’t get your hopes up about getting any more belts from the London Tanner, though. He says he is done, and it’s just as well because I don’t think many customers want to pay the price!
I hope everyone is having a wonderful day today as you nurse their hangovers and try to get ready for the new year. How many of you do resolutions? I’ve never been big on them, but I do know the power of goal setting. The problem with putting your goals in writing is that there is always a possibility that you won’t meet them. This is fine if your station in life is not one that does not involve getting spanked for other people’s amusement. If you do get spanked for other people’s amusement, then you know it’s unwise to ever let other people know what your plans are.
I once read a spanking story about a family where the girls all wrote resolutions for the new year and come New Years Eve their progress would be evaluated. If they fell short then they would be punished. I thought it was a hot concept, but I’m very relieved that my boyfriend doesn’t do anything like this.
So, what do you think? Do resolutions become rules after they are stated? Do you think people would be more likely to follow through with them if they knew that at the end of the year their bottoms were on the line? Food for thought…