I usually am too afraid to buy any kinky items for my boyfriend. There are two reasons for this. First, I am never certain of what he will like. His implement preferences are very specific, and I don’t always feel that I have a very good handle on them. I would really hate to buy him something like that and find that he didn’t want to use it. This probably goes back to my fears about being the non perceptive person who always gives bad gifts.

My other reason is simple, though. I am afraid to buy implements for my boyfriend because I know doing so will almost certainly cause them to be used against me. “You are a spanko!” everyone says, “You are supposed to like being spanked!” Well, anyone who has seen my videos knows I do not like being spanked. Unfortunately for me I am about as non masochistic of a spanko as they come. So, when I get spanked, it hurts. I can only just come to appreciate a spanking after the fact. Consequently, I am very conflicted when it comes to things like this. The harder the spanking, the more I hate it. By the same token, the harder the spanking, the more I love after it. I guess I literally love to hate them.

This year, however, I risked it. First, I agonized over what to buy him. I thought about buying him a paddle, but since he has several of those I decided on a strap. I must have looked at a hundred straps, but finally settled on a set made by Ian of The London Tanners. This was not as smooth sailing as one might think though, because I procrastinated so long at getting my order in. Ian very kindly worked overtime and shipped the straps the monday before Christmas. Unfortunately, on the wednesday before Christmas we got a little bit of snow (read blizzard). The result was that on Christmas my boyfriend received several vanilla gifts, and not a single kinky one.

Was I disappointed about this? Yes and no. I was excited to give him his straps, and in that sense I was disappointed. However the part of me that is desperately afraid of all spankings was relieved to have a reprieve from the fate I had given myself. Nevertheless, when the straps finally did arrive I wrapped them in Christmas paper and set the package under the tree that was still up. When my boyfriend arrived home it did not take long before we were alone in the bedroom and he was opening his final Christmas gift.

So, did he like it? It was rather difficult to tell because the very first thing he said upon opening the gift was, “Well, now I have to try them!” I can tell you right now, I do not like them. No, I don’t. They hurt. Especially the tawse. Why did I buy him a tawse, you ask? Oh, that’s easy. I bought him a tawse because I am completely out of my mind. Also, he didn’t have one yet. After a thorough trying out, the verdict is that they hurt. He says, “They get a very big response without very much effort.” I say,”Owww.” I will definitely post a follow up when they get put through their first full blown spanking!