During an intimate moment I found myself having my head roughly pulled back, and my partner’s mouth to my ear. With his grip still firmly in my hair he leaned down and whispered, “What you need is a good whipping isn’t it? To make you feel my control?” Tentatively, and in spite of myself I answered, “Yes, Sir.” After a few moments he added, “It’s coming soon.”
These types of exchanges always cause chills to run down my spine. Unfortunately, I am now in the waiting stage. This is delicious to read about in stories, but not nearly as fun to experience. I am stuck in limbo, and don’t know whether to be turned on or terrified. My guess is that both are appropriate, but only time will tell which is most fitting.

I’ve heard many members tell me from time to time that I come across as too submissive. These people tell me that although I have wonderful reactions during a spanking, I always seem to accept the pronouncement without comment, and hurry to obey the Top. I know why this is. The reason is that in my personal life I *am* submissive.
I make every effort to avoid getting into trouble in the first place, but if something does happen then my goal is to apologize, accept punishment as gracefully as possible (which we all know is not particularly graceful by any standard), and to return to being a good girl. In fact, I’m very unlikely to even attempt to avoid punishment, yet alone say rude things to my Dominant and fight with him.

However, I have come to understand that there are a number of spanking fans who do not want to see a “true” submissive. What these folks really want to see is a bratty girl who absolutely does not want to be spanked, and will do whatever she can to avoid it. They want to see the rude comments, and they want to see a struggle. So, I’ve tried to oblige these fans. I figured that today might be a good time to tell you about a couple of scenes I’ve shot that fit this resistance mold.

Most of my resistance scenes have been with Mr. Daniels because he is someone I can realistically struggle against without much chance of actually escaping. The first scene I remember doing this way involved my throwing a stuffed animal at him because I thought he was being unfair. The resultant struggle was amazing! We literally went all over the room, and it took great effort on his part to get me down over the bed so that he could punish me.

Another scene that stands out in my head was with Ms. Burns. She was so angry with me for gossiping about her that she began to shake me. Although I tried to get away from her, she kept a tight grip on me and I literally dropped everything in my hands from the force. This was one of those scenes that affected me personally, and I still think about it from time to time.

I’ve shot several scenes along these lines; most of them have not gone up yet. I am hoping that fans of resistance will find the scenes to their liking, because I certainly enjoy shooting them. I think getting a chance to fight back and be a brat is one of the perks of being a spanking model, really. Although it took me some time to get comfortable with this concept, I’ve found it to be an excellent release. Now I don’t have to worry nearly so much about slipping up at home!

I had a member request that I write about some scenes that I really did not want to do. That sounds like a simple request, but for me it is actually fairly complicated. The reason for this is that although I am a spanko, I am not a masochist by anyone’s definition. There was a time in my life when I thought I must be a masochist if I wanted to get spanked, but that was before I’d actually done it. I simply never counted on the extreme amount of pain associated with even a few “light” slaps with a hand. It was very disappointing for me to discover I am a wimp. I really wanted to be a masochist…

Anyway, when I discovered that I am not a masochist I was forced to reassess what it is that I am. I also spent a fair bit of time trying to decide if I actually wanted to be spanked or not. After all it is one thing to have fantasies and another to act on them. Currently my feeling is that I get much more out of having been spanked than I do out of being spanked while it is happening. Consequently, I face pretty much every spanking I ever get with a sense of fear and dread.

Yes, this includes my video shoots. That may be hard to believe, given that being a spanking model is something that I am doing of my own free will, and obviously I get something out of it. And, afterward I am very happy to have survived the experience. Before hand, though, I am usually a wreck. I get very nervous, and can’t eat until my shoot is over. Sometimes I even cry when they are telling me what the scenes for the day will be, and which implements I will be facing. In this sense I can genuinely say that I really do not want any of the spankings that I get.

However, certain scenes and implements certainly scare me more than others. I definitely dread the big wooden school paddle more than any other implement. I don’t know how much of this is in my head. Certainly I have taken very severe spankings with plenty of smaller wood implements that ultimately wound up being more severe than any of the school paddling scenes that I’ve done. That said, I’m not sure I’ve ever had a spanking that did as much damage as quickly as the school paddling. Blow by blow do they hurt more? I’m not sure. They certainly seem to for me. So, any time you see a scene involving a school paddle you can safely assume that I was terrified before it, and most definitely did not want it.

While chatting with one of my good friends on the phone yesterday I was informed of something that blew me away. Apparently while shopping for good spanking related material in Amsterdam he came across videos that had me on the cover. I was very surprised, because in general I think of what I do as primarily an online venture. Yes, I know that AEG certainly makes videos for sale, and I am even aware of having shot a full length movie (how could I possibly forget the harrowing experience that was the making of Conspiracy?) However the reality of having my image in adult stores at all, yet alone all over the country is a bit shocking!

I guess it’s related to my self image. Yeah, I’m this kinky girl who gets spanked, but am I someone whose face graces videos in adult stores world wide? I never thought so. I can’t say I’m all together bothered by this fact, it is simply that I was not expecting it at all. It certainly feeds my exhibitionist streak. It also feeds my ego. After all, what better way to feel famous in my own small way than to hear that my friends are seeing my face all over the world? I told him to make sure he looks for me at every major city he visit and report back. I think I may need to plan a trip to Amsterdam soon!

As those of you who are members will soon realise, there are several ongoing plot lines. This is something members have asked for previously, and I am really excited to be able to show a little bit in the way of developing story lines. However, because I was shooting many of these prior to the launch of www.spankingbailey.com, some of the stories may have begun on some of the other websites owned by AEG.

For the most part, I don’t think this should cause any problems. However, there is one story I know that was begun over at www.realspankingsinstitute.com and will be completing here on my site. This is the story of Ms. Burns, and her reaction to my tendency to gossip about her. There are already a couple of updates posted on the other site, including her initial confrontation and my resultant punishment, as well as one scene with my friend Renee. I highly reccomend checking out those scenes in order to understand Ms. Burns’ current reaction to the situation as it develops.

Aside from that, I’m really curious about what you guys think about developing plotlines? (more…)

So, recently we celebrated my boyfriend’s birthday. I always associate birthdays with spanking, but something tells me he is not going to let me spank him. It’s a shame, too, because I really think that every Top should get a dose of his or her own medicine once in a while. However, since he has no intention of allowing me to whack him, another issue arises. Do his birthday swats simply cancel out and disappear, or is someone else obligated to take them?

So far, the pattern has been that he gets a big kick out of threatening to give me his birthday swats (and as he is older than me this is a fairly scary proposition). However, despite a large amount of teasing every year, I have never been spanked for *his* birthday. I have been spanked for Cindy’s birthday, but that is a different story. Anyway, it seems that he would much rather tease me about this than spank me for it. I’m not sure why this is, but I’m also not sure I should complain.

This year however is a bit different. He has not threatened me with any swats at all. In fact when I asked if I should be nervous this year he said no. This could be for two reasons. The first reason would be that he has no intention of spanking me and is not up to teasing me. The other reason could be that teasing me isn’t nearly as interesting as spanking me, and I’m in for it. I could also be overthinking this. In fact, I am almost certainly over thinking this. Nevertheless, I can’t help but wonder why he has deviated from his pattern, and what it means.

Since my compulsively worrying about what may or may not happen before bed tonight is not even a little bit useful, I’ll refer to the earlier question. What do you guys think? Is it up to the bottom in the relationship to take the Top’s swats on his birthday? Should the matter be dropped altogether and spanking only take place when the bottom is unlucky enough to have a birthday? Or, most radical of all, should the Top bend over and get a taste of what they give? I will be most interested to hear your opinion!

So as some of you may know, Colorado has been getting a bit of snow. In April. That’s insane. However, it made me think back to this winter when we were hit with several blizzards in a row, and I was having a hard time guessing when it would melt. So, what is a girl to do when there is a whole lot of snow and not a lot of driving to be done? Why, fantasize of course! This is what I came up with then, though I’ve been saving it for a snowy day. I just didn’t think it would be April… (more…)

Hi Guys,

WE ARE LIVE! Visa gave their approval, and everyone can now actually join my site. This is really exciting for me, because I can’t wait to hear what people think! I know what I think. I think my bottom worked awfully hard for this to happen, and it would be a shame to let it down now!

I can tell you that on this site you will find a wide variety of scenarios, and varying degrees of severity. I am spanked with all kinds of implements, from bare hands up through wooden paddles and canes. I am spanked at home, and at school, as well as other situations when they arise. I really do think it has something for everyone! I hope you will agree, and I can’t wait to hear from all of you!

Although I have always had aspirations of being a domestic goddess, I am afraid I fall short . You see, I did not grow up in a home where I learned all the domestic things that many little girls do. Oh, I did have to clean my room and help with the rest of the house. I had to clean up after dinner, but that was about it. I never learned to do things like cook, and I was never very crafty. That was all well and good when I had other people to do those things for me, but when I left home and met my current partner, things suddenly got tricky. Suddenly I was being called on to do things I had never done before in my life, by someone who did not have the necessary skills to teach me. I thought sharing a few of these mishaps might give some insight into me, or at least what a dork I am. I’ll do these in the order they occurred.

Lesson One: Juice Making (more…)

As you may recall, I recently posted an entry about a promise my Partner made that I would soon be receiving a good whipping. I’ve waited for quite a long time, and I would say I’ve waited patiently. However every little swat to my backside resulted in my asking, “Um, Sir, was that the thing you promised…” only to be told “No” again and again. Was I disappointed about this? I would say I was, but also more and more nervous with each smaller incident because I knew that the extremely painful spanking I just received was not the “big one”.

Well, the “big one” finally occured. My boyfriend told me we were going to talk, and my first question was, “Am I in trouble?” I usually am not in trouble, but when I am he often says we need to “talk.” However, he convinced me that I was not in trouble, and in fact, he had no intention of doing anything other than talking. So, with my nerves calm I walked into our talk. We did talk, and it was very nice and productive. However after our talk, I got spanked. I hadn’t counted on that. After all, I let him convince me that we were not going to “talk”, we were just going to talk. I hadn’t thought about a third option. How totally unfair.

Still, the spanking was desperately needed. I didn’t like it one bit while it happened. In fact, I kicked and cried and yelled into the covers of my bed. I did all the things that girls do when they are being punished, but this wasn’t a punishment. This was just something that we both needed. I’m glad he did it, and I was happy and relieved to finally hear a, “Yes” to the question I asked when he was done! Not that I won’t find something else to get worked up and nervous about…